i neeeeeeeeed this:
Part of the problem with a fandom that is canonically set in high school is, uh, HIGH SCHOOL AUs ARE A MOOT POINT. I just don’t know what I could possibly write in Teen Wolf fandom; my first inclination is to always write something stupid about boys in love, only…THAT IS KIND OF CANON IN TEEN WOLF.
So naturally, my brain is all “I can fix this! WRITE AN AVENGERS TEEN WOLF AU!” because my brain hates me. In this hypothetical AU that I won’t be writing, Steve gets bitten and finds himself becoming a werewolf and holy crap, he doesn’t have to worry about his asthma inhaler anymore and can suddenly kick ass at lacrosse, and oh hey, really hot new guy at school is looking at him. OF COURSE Allison is Tony, since Howard Stark would make THE MOST AMAZING WEREWOLF HUNTER EVER. And Steve is super adorable and awkward and faily around Tony, but Tony just thinks he’s kind of amazing, and there are makeouts.
Meanwhile Steve’s best friend PHIL FUCKING COULSON (who goes by Coulson all the time since Phil is a name from the 1940s, geez) is all “Oh my god, I am going to read EVERYTHING IN EXISTENCE ABOUT WEREWOLVES because what even is my life anymore,” as Steve is too busy mooning over Tony. And there is a glowery, anti-social werewolf named CLINT BARTON, who lost his family years ago to a house fire and it was just him and his brother Barney, only Barney is THE ALPHA and turned Steve to join his pack. Clint’s kind of scary and intense, and Phil is more than a little freaked out by him, but did he mention the part where Clint’s also really hot and drives a Camaro?
Somewhere in all this I think Natasha is Lydia (ahaha POOR COULSON) and DUH LOKI IS JACKSON, which…may or may not actually make Lydia Thor?? Or maybe Thor is Danny lolololol.
SOB CAN YOU IMAGINE TONY RUNNING AROUND WITH A CROSSBOW AND HOWARD’S ALL “>:((( YOU WILL NOT SEE STEVE ANYMORE OR WE’LL HAVE TO KILL HIM,” BUT TONY’S LIKE “I DO WHAT I WANT,” AND THEN HE AND STEVE HAVE SEX IN THE BACKSEAT OF TONY’S CAR WHILE LOKI TURNS INTO A KILLER LIZARD.
OR IMAGINE THAT TIME COULSON HAS TO SAVE CLINT’S LIFE BECAUSE CLINT WAS PARALYZED BY LOKI AND COULSON HAS TO SPEND TWO HOURS TREADING WATER IN THE SCHOOL POOL TO KEEP CLINT AFLOAT BECAUSE HE HAS TO KEEP CLINT ALIVE TO SAVE THEM.
^ This! Anyone? PLEASE?!